King of This Town

(with apologies to Roger Miller)

Don't need to pay no rent
sleepin' underneath a vent.
Free dope, free needles too.
There's the alley where I poo.

I smoke crack right in front of cops;
Steal from houses, cars and shops.
I get off scot-free. They've made me
King of this town.

Old Larry Campbell rocks.
All the wisdom that he talks.
He does his best for me.
He saved the shootin' gallery.

And now, that Mayor, he's the man.
Let me hit it in his van.
This beats Calgary. They've made me
King of this town.


I know every sucker judge
who cries over me.
Every bailiff
and how long I'll be.

And you know I know that it won't be long;
It won't be long 'til I'll be out and singin' this song.
'Cause I -

Don't need to pay no rent ...