Human rights advocates are applauding Poughkeepsie Sasquatches defenceman Owen Weirdeau who has come out as the first openly deft professional athlete.
Weirdeau, who appeared at a press conference called by the team, was accompanied by his partner, Poopsie, who declined to speak.
"There's still so much rampant coprophobia out there," said the Toronto native. "People use horrible words like "coprophilia", they think like we're mentally ill, like what we do is sick and disgusting somehow, like its something abnormal. Like we need treatment or something."
Democrat US Senator Dianne Feinstein immediately pledged to introduce legislation recognizing the right of the deft community to marry their partners.
"There is absolutely no reason marriage should be so narrowly defined as being between humans and the animate." Feinstein declared at an ACLU rally in Altoona. "Nothing can be a higher priority than addressing this horrible injustice."
In Ottawa, Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau, addressing an audience of elementary school students, called on Stephen Harper to "quit destroying Canada for at least as long as it takes to recognize deft marriage as an inalienated, university human right."