Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Just Thinking Out Loud Of Course ...


So, Blogger introduced this new ‘stats’ feature last August. Shortly afterward (okay, it was some weeks afterward, hey, I’m getting on a bit) I noticed the new tab on the dashboard.

Words can’t adequately describe my soaring ennui as I clicked it to confirm what I already knew: my blog was being regularly visited by about a dozen or so people, mostly family and friends, the occasional jihadi froot loop and plenty o’ spam bots …

When I recovered from the shock of my life, naturally my first thought was “How can I cash in on this?”

Well, do I come across as some sort of Commie?

Ads, ‘monetizing’ they call it (nice word, lovely word), seemed a good start, until it dawned on me that, from what I’ve seen out there, I’d wind up being brought to you by something like:

On second thought …

But then it hit me- why not a Gift Shoppe?! Everybody has one of those, heck, even the Vicious Babushka has one of those, and I can only dream of being as, well, vicious as she is.

Hmm, now, what to flog?

T shirts are a no-brainer:

A nifty car flag sure to sell well in Alberta.

Stationery is always popular as gifts.

Oh, I know, some ripoff nice commemorative paper plat dinnerware, also crafted from finest 100% unrecycled BC pulp.

“Stay ahead of the curve with the ‘His and Hers’ set!”

“On a diet?”

“This little number should help.”

And gosh, the ad copy for all this crap fine, fine merch would just about write itself. Could be on to something here.

I’ll get back to you.

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